Team Outcast
by Icanbeselfishbuti'malsosweet
Summary: Thirteen years ago an information mission required Inoichi to seduce his target. Now as a result Ino has an annoying younger brother of all of two months. When it comes time for team asignments things only get worse from there.
1. Chapter 1

**Team Outcast**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor do I make any profit off of this work**_

**Prologue**

**13 Years Earlier**

Inoichi was cleaning up the new flower shop he and his two month pregnant wife had recently started together. He had retired from the T&I department when he heard the news. He had honestly been thinking about it for awhile some of the things he had to do as a T&I Nin would make a demon shudder. Just as he was finishing up with cleaning the shop Inoichi saw an ANBU with a face mask shaped like a bat appear in his shop.

"Hokage-sama requests your presence immediately there's an emergency that requires you're attention," said the bat ANBU before grabbing Inoichi and using Shunshin to take them to the Hokage's private mission briefing room.

"Bat you are dismissed" said the Hokage and immediately Bat popped out the way he came in.

"Forgive me Hokage-sama but why was I called in I retired two weeks ago." Said Inoichi feeling like his well earned retirement was about to end.

"And normally I wouldn't ask this of you but Choza and Shikaku were recently captured on what was supposed to be a simple C-rank mission and we have no idea where they are," said the Hokage

"We do however know about someone who should know where they are," said the Hokage.

"The informant is the sister of the minor lord who has ties to a group of C-rank Nuke-nin who somehow captured your friends. The informant can't know that she released the information on where her nephew stores his files. Unfortunately her entire estate is full of seals that prevent Chakra use and we can't simply disable them because that would alert them to our presence. Fortunately the target is well known to enjoy the company of men with blonde hair,"

"Do you accept this mission Inoichi?" asked the Hokage.

"Hai Hokage-sama," said Inoichi with determination shining in his eyes.

Inoichi knowing that using **Hijutsu: Kokoro Kanran** wouldn't work so before he left he made a serum he had used in interrogation that causes the target to fall into a hypnotic state where they can't lie and they won't remember what happened when it was used. The only reason it was used more often is because the target had to be feeling intense positive emotions for it to work. He only hoped it would be a last resort.

Two weeks later Inoichi was at his wits end. He had shown up at court presenting himself as a traveling poet and set about courting his target. Despite countless offers to join her in her room she wouldn't tell him anything about her brother. Inoichi knowing that his friends were running out of time took her up on her offer and placed the serum on his lips. As they were climaxing together she finally maneuvered to kiss him making her ingest the serum allowing Inoichi to finally question her on the whereabouts of her brother's files.

Inoichi immediately went and found the files stating where his friends were and hurried home to report to the Hokage hoping to never have to think of this mission again. Alas that was never to be as standard practice in Konoha was that in the case of missions where seduction is necessary and pregnancy possible a follow up mission was always preformed five months down the line to discover if pregnancy had occurred. Than if so a second follow up mission was to occur after the child was born to perform paternity tests upon said child.

If the child was sired by a Konoha shinobi than after evaluating if the child was wanted or not and if the child was worth anything to Konoha than the child was left there or taken back to Konoha. Unfortunately for Inoichi's happy marriage not only was the child a Yamanaka and therefore useful the child was also not wanted by the mother at all in fact she was planning to drown him. Which is why nine months and two days after the mission Inoichi Yamanaka was called into the Hokages office to discover that he was now the father of a young reverse dirty blonde haired boy with his eyes and jawline. No one blamed the man for promptly fainting from shock (ok maybe a little after all he was supposed to be a ninja).

A/N reverse dirty blonde is when instead of having the typical light brown with golden blonde mixed in reverse dirty blonde is white blonde with dark brown mixed in.

A/N2: **Hijutsu: Kokoro Kanran **is the name I gave to the mind reading technique the Yamanaka's use since the wikia didn't give a name and since Hijustsu means hidden justsu and it's a yamanaka clan thing than I assumed it was a Hijutsu if I'm wrong I apologise please let me know with valid proof backing you up and not just stupid flames screaming I'm wrong and stupid and my story sucks yada yada ya I really don't care at that point cause I than assume the poster is retarded and unworthy of consideration greater than what I give a fly.

A/N3: Yes I know it's a self insert but he will not be super powerful or even end up with a super awesome main character or any other mary sue stuff I am challenging myself to write a character from scratch and not make them a mary sue so let me know if I start to go in that direction however constructive criticism is welcome idiotic flames are not and yes since this is a self insert the main character will be gay since I am gay myself so if there is any romance at all which I'm not sure if there will be it will be male/male don't like i don't care


	2. Chapter 2

Team Outcast

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor do I make any profit off of this work_**

"Hi" –talking

"_Hi"- thinking_

"**Hi"- Jutsu**

"Hi" – writing

**Chapter 1: Ino-Nee goes to school so I can too nyah**

Kuramaru Yamanaka had been called and told plenty of mean things in his short five years of life. He had been called bastard by those mean old ladies who he wasn't supposed to hear, He had been called Kura-tama by Ino-nee in front of all the kids their age just to embarrass him, He had even been called stupid by someone who up until he was three he had thought was his mother. Kuramaru had always been told by his dad that he was just as important as Ino-nee to him but ever since he can remember Ino-nee was simply treated better. However the one thing he would not stand for was that his big sister got to go to the cool ninja school when he had to go to the civilian school.

This was why he had just finished wailing his head off in the single biggest fit he had ever thrown (Hey he was five he is allowed to cry). All day long he made a nuisance of himself and when Noriko-Okaa went to spank him he actually bit her hand hard enough to draw blood at which point Inoichi had to step in. That is how are Kuramaru found himself in his father's office for the very first time. Inoichi for his part was nursing a huge headache who knew that his usually quiet son could scream like that.

"Kuramaru-kun could you tell me why you decided it was a good idea to attempt to bite off your Okaasan's hand" said Inoichi who was trying hard to be fair despite his headache.

"She's not my Kaasan I've never even met my Kaasan and I'm sick of Ino-baka getting all the fun things to happen to her I wanna go to ninja school too!," shouted Kuramaru.

"Kuramaru-kun how do you know about that," said Inoichi.

"Those mean old ladies who always give Ino-baka candy but give me mean looks kept calling me bastard real quietly so I went and looked it up," said Kuramaru looking proud of himself for knowing a grown up word and pouting at the same time it was adorable really.

"Kuramaru-kun even if Kaasan isn't your mom she is still my wife and she did help raise you and deserves all the respect that has earned from you understand," said Inoichi firmly "Therefore you are going to run three laps around the Yamanaka clan compound for what you did to your Kaasan young man,"

"However the decision to put you in civilian school was made by the clan elders," said Inoichi holding up his hand to stall any protests his son would make "However since they clearly don't have the good judgment to not let a five year old find out something like this from them than clearly they can't be trusted to decide where you will go to school therefore I will enroll you in the ninja academy with your Oneesan tomorrow do not make me regret this," finished Inoichi.

Kuramaru let out an excited noise and immediately went and did the run ordered by his Tousan so he could show off how willing he was to listen.

* * *

><p>Inoichi didn't know what to do since Kuramaru was a clan bastard he wasn't allowed to learn the clan Hijustu and that problem would have been solved had he gone to civilian school. Despite the circumstances involving how his son came to him Inoichi still loved him just as much as Ino and he didn't want him to be defenseless. Inoichi was about to start despairing when his eyes fell on an order form for a poison to be made and a slow smile formed on Inoichi's lips.<p>

"_If my son can't learn the clan Hijutsu than I'll just have to make sure he learns from the clan business instead after all poison can be even more deadly than a mind," _thought Inoichi

* * *

><p>The next day both Ino and Kuramaru were walking with their father to the ninja academy. Ino was busy day dreaming of holding how awesome she was over her annoying little otouto was going to be even if she was only two months older those two months clearly made her better. Kuramaru meanwhile was hiding behind his dad's pants leg and looking around in awe of all the cool things he was seeing. Inoichi for his part was amused at his children's antics.<p>

When they arrived at the school the administrative lady asked "Will they both be attending here?"

Inoichi of course answered "Yes they both will," causing all of Ino's day dreams to shatter all around her.

Ino immediately shrieked "What do you mean both of us I was supposed to be way cooler than Kura-tama,"

"Ino not now we will discuss this when we get home," said Inoichi.

"That's right Ino-nee you can't beat me and I'm gonna be a super duper awesomer ninja than you so nyah,' said Kuramaru sticking his tongue out.

"Enough," said Inoichi in a raised voice "**Genjutsu: Kokoro Koritsu (Mental timeout illusion)**. Causing both Kuramaru and Ino to have their eyes glazed over and as far as they were concerned they were sitting in a chair in a white room with no way out.

"Now what papers do I sign," said Inoichi charmingly.

A/N: please let me know if I'm keeping in character as far as I know Inoichi is an intelligent, gentle but firm man and I'm trying to keep him with that in mind. Ino to me is only bratty to her younger brother because she is young and she will grow out of that but siblings fight and it would be stupid if they got along perfectly all the time. I took the name Noriko for Ino's mom since that's the name of her voice actor and I'm portraying her as someone who while she doesn't love Kuramaru she will not allow herself to treat a child unfairly for something his father had to do for the village so for the most part she stern but kind to Kuramaru but Ino does receive preferential treatment from her.


End file.
